Upcoming surgery

Hello all-

So tomorrow I am having a pre-surgical exploration scope to look at my esophagus and stomach. This is in preparing for a surgery on my stomach a week from tomorrow. (Monday) So I will be MIA during this time.

I'm really nervous for this! Tomorrow is just a scope but they still put you under anesthesia, which I hate!! :'( I hate going under and I hate waking up from anesthesia, it's so scary! What if you never wake up?! Jake tried to calm my nerves by saying "The great thing about anesthesia is that if you never wake up, you will have no idea and it will be a painless death" THAT DOESN'T HELP AT ALL! We both just have very different view of death. I'm absolutely terrified of dying and his motto is basically that there's nothing you can do about it.


I know that our D/s relationship/mentality will really help me through this time. I don't like anything medical, especially IV's! I get extremely crazy and I yell at the nurses/doctors, just because I'm panicking. I know having Jake there will help calm me down, I'm sure I will get a few "You better calm down" looks from him.

After my surgery on Monday I will have stitches in my stomach which will mean no spanking for awhile. He somehow stumbeled onto the idea of Capsazian cream, I'm rather annoyed he found out about this little trick. Hopefully he won't need it, or use it.

On a really good note I have Doctor's orders to do no laundry, dishes, vacuuming or any other house work that requires lifting/bending/pushing etc. I'm so happy. :)

I appreciate your prayers over the next week, catch ya'll on the flipside!