Meet me at the alter in your white dress!

I'm getting married soon!!!

J is enforcing a bedtime right now until the wedding because I have turned into quite the diva. The stress of my job plus wedding has had me making quite a few poor choices with my words. :'( I was supposed to be in bed by 11 tonight, but thus, here I am, at 12:30am still up.

I can't sleep. I have permanent 'nervous stomach' aka butterflies in my tummy. Although these butterflies feel less like lightweight little insects and a lot more like giant dinosaurs.

Got the spanking of a lifetime last night. I went into a bridal craze and cussed J out while he was at work. I knew well that he couldn't say anything to me, because there were people around him at work and he obviously remains vanilla. I got some stern texts that night and as soon as he got home in the morning the issue was addressed. I got the purple paddle, which is my LEAST favorite implement we have. I completely lost count of how many I got but all I know is that my butt went from white to red to purple and then back to white and I went completely numb from my tailbone to mid-thigh. Then I got the wooden rod an additional 30 or so whacks. Those left deep welts in my butt, like inside the muscle. It was so bad.

I was physically shaking and was winded from the pain for about 20 minutes afterwards. It was absolutely terrible. But I also know what I did was probably the worst thing I have EVER done and J completely did not deserve it. I was so out of line, it was disgusting.

I'm hoping that punishment will keep me set until the wedding.

Good night everyone.

Whomp Whomp

Alright so I really suck at updating. I kept getting emails asking me to update, so here I am.

First, I am making a commitment to update at least once a week. That's my new goal to myself. :) Let's see if I have the self-discipline to actually follow through.

We have been in a whirlwind of stress, work, family and wedding planning. J has been working SO much to save up his PTO for wedding events. He worked 160hours in two weeks. I have been working a lot as well. I feel so bad for our dogs, they are getting the short end of the stick. :( Poor babies. But I have been sneaking Mocha(our wild one) to the local doggie daycare for some exercise on random days. Shhh don't tell Jake. He doesn't know. :) He'd freak because it costs $20 every time she goes.

My bachlorette party was two weekends ago. It was A BLAST. A "Blast in a glass!" as Snooki would say. We went to a bar in down town Detroit and spent the entire night dancing and hanging out with two other bachlorette parties that were there. I was grounded from drinking any alcohol but J made a special exception for this night. :) I was happy.

Life has been super stressful right now with the wedding coming up and with all the time we have spent working. The morning after my bachlorette party I woke up and thought "Oh shit, I have three weeks till my wedding and about a year of planning to do" I went into complete bridezilla panic mode. I have even pulled 2 all nighters working on stuff. It's pretty crazy. I got punished for pulling the all nighter Jake knows about. I shouldn't have done it and it ruined the small amount of time we had together. Got about 80 with the wooden paddle. I was definitely in tears.

The wedding is all coming together, only a few minor details to do and I will be all done. :) :) :)

The DD couple that has helped us through that last few months will be coming to the wedding an Carolyn will actually be IN my wedding!! :)

J has really helped keep me level headed. I have gotten quite a few stern looks in public recently. J has recently become more comfortable with his role in public. We obviously stay vanilla but people are becoming more aware of our roles as Dominate/submissive and I'm happy they are realizing and are accpeting of that.

Goodnight for now!

Getting things straight

Hello Everyone-

My wedding shower is this Sunday. I'm very excited! I can't wait to see all my friends and family. But I'm nervous, I hate being the center of attention, it makes me really uncomfortable. Especially since I recently lost a lot of weight, every time I haven't seen someone in a long time they spend the first 5 minutes in shock of how I look. So I know when everyone sees me there's going to be a lot of fuss about my weight and then constant questions about the wedding. 

So life has been has been a little different lately. As I become more stressed out with the upcoming wedding shower, new job and the wedding itself, Jake has been getting a lot more strict. I have been very high-strung lately which leads me to making rash decisions and being quite snippy.

I have been spanked more times in the last week and a half than I can even remember, but I'm pretty sure it's been almost every day, sometimes twice a day. But as my title says, I think I'm finally getting on track. :) Slowly I'm becoming a little bit more sane as I cross off tasks on my to-do list.

I love DD so much, it has gotten me through a really stressful time of my life. If we were a 'vanilla' couple, I know that there would be so many fights and this household would be very high stress. I'm so lucky to have my fiance. :)

Life Update / Converting a Vanilla

Hello!

So I obviously have been slacking. I had major surgery October 10th, after that we went to Vegas and with my health and vacation, I let this slip. :) Whoops.

Holidays were good, very busy, but fun! I got a new Pistol for Christmas from my family, it is amazing. I went shooting with it for the first time yesterday, it definitely needs to be broken in!

Converting a Vanilla:

Converting a vanilla to a spanko life is a lot of work. :) When I originally was trying to figure out how to introduce this concept to Jake, I was only thinking of the things *he* would have to do. I never thought about myself and all the changes I would have to make to be a better submissive and fiance.

As we learn more and more about this lifestyle, we grow and change as a couple. It's been great. Jake has been doing a lot of his own research and reading on D/s and with that, he has become a much stronger and loving Dominate.

We have a very specific set of rules written out, and the exact punishment they will bring.  It's a very clear concept... if I chose to do/not do something, I'm actively choosing the consequence. I really enjoy the clarity, whereas I know a lot of Dominates would probably prefer to choose consequences as situations came. But it works for us.

We've become good friends with another D/s couple. Unfortunately they live very far away from us, in West Virginia. But I have learned a lot from Carolyn and hopefully Jake can learn from her husband. And hopefully after the wedding we can make a trip down there to see them. You can find their blog here. She keeps it updated a lot more than I do! :)

For now, my thoughts are scrambled and my brain is sleepy. I'll update soon.

An update! Finally! and Leaving for Vegas!!

Alright, sorry it's been so long.

Surgery went well. Road to recovery has been long and frustrating, mainly I have no energy. I'm only about to eat about 500-600 calories a day right now which means I have NO energy. I've been off from work which has been super nice. I love staying at home, cleaning the house, taking care of the puppies and taking care of Jake!

Because of the surgery, internal and external stitches and overall fragile health, we have put the physical aspect of D/s on hold and guess what... it's awful!! Ugh. I never realized how much I love this lifestyle until I can't have it!

Jake is pretty much a spanking-only person for punishment. He's been putting up with a LOT lately too. My pain medication turns me into a little monster (I'm not sure why! He said it's a normal reaction for some people though). I snap at him, cry, get demanding, get sleepy etc from this medication, it's unfortunate, but I need it. Jake has had the patience of an angel through all of this. He's taking a lot more right now that he would usually put up with because of my health but now that I'm almost completely healed, he's been getting a bit more pushy on things.

First things first I was told my health was no excuse for a messy house. I've been so exhausted lately and I've really let myself use that as an excuse to leave the house messy and get behind on laundry. But I know it's unacceptable and Jake made sure I knew that with not working, I was 100% expected to keep up the house. I had a few bad days but Jake snapped me back into place.

Now that I'm a few weeks out and using less pain medication, Jake has been jumping on my attitude and sarcastic remarks a lot more. I never realized how much I can let my mouth run with all the freedom he was giving me.

It makes me sad when I'm sarcastic or rude. It's so awful to disrespect him, I don't know why I do it, it makes me so sad. I need D/s to help me release my guilt and feel as though I am forgiven. We have a bit of tension right now and I know it's because I'm feeling guilty and Jake is feeling caught between trying to be a Hoh but also an understanding and empathetic fiance.

We are leaving for Vegas tomorrow morning. I'm hoping we will take advantage of the hotel room and do some spanking and get back on track!

I miss D/s so much. I need it, our relationship suffers without it. It just makes me realize how special our relationship is and how lucky I am to have a man who loves me and takes care of me in the way that I need. <3

I'll update you after Vegas. Hopefully I will have some spanking updates!!!

Back and healing nicely!!

Hello everyone! I'm healing nicely. I'm very loopy on liquid Vicodin right now, so I just wanted to stop in and say that I'm alive, doing well and so happy with the results of my surgery!!

I will update tomorrow with how D/s has been apart of our lives during this surgery and recovery period.

Also, hello to my new followers! I appreciate your readership!

Upcoming surgery

Hello all-

So tomorrow I am having a pre-surgical exploration scope to look at my esophagus and stomach. This is in preparing for a surgery on my stomach a week from tomorrow. (Monday) So I will be MIA during this time.

I'm really nervous for this! Tomorrow is just a scope but they still put you under anesthesia, which I hate!! :'( I hate going under and I hate waking up from anesthesia, it's so scary! What if you never wake up?! Jake tried to calm my nerves by saying "The great thing about anesthesia is that if you never wake up, you will have no idea and it will be a painless death" THAT DOESN'T HELP AT ALL! We both just have very different view of death. I'm absolutely terrified of dying and his motto is basically that there's nothing you can do about it.


I know that our D/s relationship/mentality will really help me through this time. I don't like anything medical, especially IV's! I get extremely crazy and I yell at the nurses/doctors, just because I'm panicking. I know having Jake there will help calm me down, I'm sure I will get a few "You better calm down" looks from him.

After my surgery on Monday I will have stitches in my stomach which will mean no spanking for awhile. He somehow stumbeled onto the idea of Capsazian cream, I'm rather annoyed he found out about this little trick. Hopefully he won't need it, or use it.

On a really good note I have Doctor's orders to do no laundry, dishes, vacuuming or any other house work that requires lifting/bending/pushing etc. I'm so happy. :)

I appreciate your prayers over the next week, catch ya'll on the flipside!

Attitude Adjustement

I don't know what's wrong with me lately. :( I'm just in a grouchy mood. I hate it. The whole time I'm in a bad mood and snipping at Jake, I think in my head "Stop! Hey Asia! Stop! He didn't do anything wrong" but for some reason my mouth just wont stop word vomitting! Yesterday I had a rough day. Jake and I had been together for four days straight so I don't know if that had something to do with it, but I was bitchy all day. We got in an argument about a traffic light! How redicilous is that? So dumb.

Our main argument right now is that I'm supposed to be starting a new job, which would be a great opportunity but I also already have an elective surgery scheduled. This surgery would make me a much more happy person but it would require me passing up the job. But the job is temporary, it only lasts until Oct 28th. But it would get my foot in the door with a great organization.... I want the surgery, he wants me to take the job. We're at a crossroads, which keeps creating arguments.

Yesterday I got spanked twice for my attitude. The second time we were laying in bed about to go to sleep, I can't remember exactly what I said but I know that it wasn't nice. Jake was spanking me harder than he ever has and I was still angry inside. The spanking hurt so bad, but I think it was more the anger that I was feeling, rather than the spanking. 

I had a really stressful day today too. Left home at 8:30am and didn't stop moving or get home until 9:30pm. I'm a sleepy girl.

Goodnight everyone.
Asia

Hectic Days

Been a few hectic days. Tonight Jake is at work and I'll be home alone with the puppies. I will be sure to update! <3

Working on Laziness

So I have a bad habit... once I'm in my house for the night, that's where I like to stay. I don't like running out for little things here and there. Well, yesterday the dogs needed food and I had rented four (yes, four) movies, that needed to be returned before midnight. I literally had nothing to do all day, so I made the obvious choice and waited until about 9pm to start working on my "to-do" list.

Well, this first started off biting me in the ass because the pet store closed at 6pm, so the dogs had no food for dinner or breakfast! Poor babies! I didn't want to buy some random food for them at Walmart because they both have to be on a limited ingredient diet or else they get terrible intestinal problems which ends up on our carpet. So I made them some dinner at home.

 Well, after I returned home from Walmart I realized I forgot to return ALL the DVD's. But ugh.... it was raining, dark and cold. As I stood in my doorway I looked outside and looked back at my couch with my favorite blanket calling my name, the choice was obvious. I really thought Jake wouldn't be too upset about not returning, but thus, I was wrong. You'd think I'd learn.

He came home in the morning, the first thing he said to me when he woke me up was about the movies, I confessed I didn't return them out of pure laziness. He told me I would be getting 5 strokes for every dollar the return fee cost. Dammit. Well, I don't think either of us really understood how much late fees are. I got out of bed and returned the DVD's with my tail between my legs. I expected it to be about a dollar a movie, but then the clerk handed me this receipt:

Seriously? $9.50? The movies weren't even 1 night late! They were about 8 hours late! My heart sank. It cost us $4.50 to rent the movies and $9.50 for the late fee. I quickly did my math... 9.5 X's 5 = oh shit.
So I got home and tiptoed around the subject for awhile. I left the receipt out on the table for Jake's casual viewing, which of course was right when he came into the living room.

As you may have read in my previous post, we got a new paddle that I HATE. We have deemed it our "extreme discipline" paddle. Well, I was certain that this was not going to be an incident for that, but yet again, I was wrong. I tried to talk my way into a bathbrush or bare bottom hand but obviously my pleas had no effect on Jake's already decided punishment.

I got 35 with the death paddle (10 off for being honest about being lazy, rather than lying and saying I forgot). It was pretty terrible. I didn't cry, I really thought I was going to. I feel like we need a different position, right now I am on all 4's on the bed. Jake said it's the easiest way to control me from wiggling and to see me in place. But I want to try a new position. What's your favorite spanking position? Love to hear some comments!

Ta ta for now!
Asia

New implement for repeat offense

So we tried out a new implement today for a repeat offense....

Scent is scientifically the easiest way to recall a memory. I'm sure there is at least one person we can think of that every time we step in their house, there's that amazing smell. Sometimes it's a cotton smell, sometimes it's carmel, pumpkin or whatever else. Well, I LOVE that idea. So I constantly keep our house burning with candles and warmers. I find the problem is that during the night when all of these things are put out, the morning brings a scentless house! So I have been keeping on the two warmers that I have. They rather small, night-light sized bulbs in them. Something like this:

Well, Jake has told me multiple times he does not want me to leave the warmers on at night for a variety of reasons. First the scent/smell overwhelms  the house and the most obvious thing, it wastes electricity. But, I've persisted to leave them on night after night, justifying in my head that they are tiny bulbs and use just a small amount of electricity.

Two nights ago just before bed, Jake went out into the kitchen and turned both the warmers off and while he was in the bathroom I ran back out there and turned them both on :) assuming he was retiring to the bedroom for the night. Well, my mistake. It seems Jake had to switch his laundry from the washer to the dryer and he obviously saw the warmers on.

When he came back into the bedroom he was upset that I had deliberately turned them on, when he specifically asked me not to. Obviosuly. I received a fairly hard hand spanking, we talked for awhile and then went to bed. I think he was under the assumption that was enough to curb the habit, but he really under estimated my love for a scented house. :)

This morning Jake came home from work (He works 6am to 6am- 24 hour shifts) and to his surprise, when he came home, both warmers were on. I suppose I left them on in a slight attempt to see if he really cared about them or if he was just making a stink over nothing. Well, he cared.

He came into the bedroom and said nothing for awhile. We were cuddling and talking and then out of the blue came the "You left the warmers on, even after I told you to turn them off at night. You are going to have to get spanked for that". We were in a good moment so he didn't want to ruin it, so he saved it for later. It just so happened later brought the mail where we recieved our new paddle:

This is our new paddle, which can be bought here. It's a great website where all the paddles are home made and the shipping was ridiculously fast. I swear I'm not like doing a cheap plug for them, I'm just a happy customer who is happy to pass along the name of an honest and great company! ANYWAY... spanking time came and we (he) decided to use the new paddle. All I have to say it is, to date, the worst (but best!) implement that has been used on my bottom. It is a very heavy wood that leaves the sting of a bee and the thud of a elephant.

Jake brought me to the very edge of tears, I could feel them welling up in the corners of my eyes right as he stopped. I believe I only received 15 strokes, but honestly, this paddle did in 15 strokes what a half hour hand spanking couldn't do. It was awful.

Afterwords I apologized, still nearly on the edge of tears. We hugged, layed on the bed for a few minutes and now it is behind us.

Needless to say, I won't be leaving the warmers on at night any more. :)

With a sore bottom,
Asia.

Really cool article for D/d couples...

I found this article on Yahoo! News. It talks about 5 habits that tend to end marriages. I find it funny because ALL FIVE of the bad habits could be resolved in a D/d relationship.

Why can't society catch on that this way of life is absolutely amazing. I feel so sad when I see failed relationships or relationships that have so many issues that a simple warm butt could fix. :)

Check out this article, and let me know what you think.

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/5-mistakes-i-continue-to-make-in-my-marriage-2563655/

For now,
Asia.

So grateful for the support

I recently joined fetlife and spanko and I have become so fulfilled with all the new people I've met. I've had many Doms and subs message, IM, write on my wall etc. The out-pour of self-less minded people who are willing to give their time to share their experiences and advice almost overwhelms me.

We started this crazy journey alone and after recently joining all the forums and groups online, it has taken what was a great Dd relationship to a mind-blowing, unexplainable, fulfilling relationship. I can honestly say I've already seen a dramatic improvement in myself as a sub and in him as a Dom after the few short days we have been apart of such an amazing community! :)

A few special shout outs to Carolyn, Jill and Kalin for being some great gal pals. We are all going through the same experiences and it's amazing to be able to talk to them.

Can't wait to write more.

For now,
Asia.

Introduction! :)

Whenever I read spanko blogs, I love to image the personality of the people being talked about, beyond what is written about them.  I will introduce us to you a little so reading can be more personal.

My name is Asia. No I don't have a sister named Europe, a brother named Nigeria and NO I'VE NEVER BEEN TO ASIA. Okay, so now that the questions are out of the way, we can move on. :) I'm 24 years old, will be 25 at the end of the year. I graduated college and realized I hated my degree. Since then I've been running my own online business. As an only child with two full-time working parents, I was always very independent and self-reliant. And I still am. I have a few character flaws, as we all do. :) I'm very fickle, I lose EVERYTHING, I'm emotional. I like not knowing what my day is going to contain, just going with where my mood takes me. I am not good at making plans in advance and rarely keep any appointments I make.

Jake is my preying mantis, this nickname started a long time ago but it has a lot of hidden meanings, maybe you can learn about them later :) He's extremely Dominate, organized, concise, likes to have every detail of every minute of every day planned out. He has NO character flaws. ;)

We met through a friend, he caught my attention while I was actually pursuing another boy in the bar. :) Jake is literally a DREAM. He cares so much about me, listens to everything I say, remembers everything I say (which isn't always good for me!), is spontaneous, romantic, dominate, cares so much about everything that I care about, and when he isn't interested... he acts interested. He'll listen to me talk on and on about clothing he's never heard of, fashion he doesn't pay attention to, friends he's never met drama, tv shows he's never seen any anything else I could ever think about. I love to talk, I could literally type in this blog until my fingers bled.

Our relationship is a little bit less extreme than a normal "spanko" lifestyle. We are pretty much living the dream in the D/s lifestyle. We have a few different dynamics, depending on who we're with. Around our families he is still dominate, as both our families know tid-bits about our lifestyle. Around our friends we remain very Vanilla. (lame!)


I love seeing him in different dynamics, like when we're with our friends and I know I'm open to joke and tease a little more, but must also be aware that consequences could follow.

I LOVE him. Our life is truly blessed by an amazing support system of family and friends. We've both been very fortunate with our upbringings and choices we've made in life.

Stay tuned for more updates. I plan to update daily on our life's little antics!

For Now,

Asia